Climbing a Tree
by cmac0824
Summary: Brittany convinces Santana to climb a tree with her and Santana gets a little more than she bargained for. Santana's POV. Pre-show.
1. The Tree

"This is stupid, Brit!" Santana Lopez shouted up at the tall skinny blond clambering higher and higher into the oak. She crossed her arms stubbornly, "You're gunna get stuck up there and I'm _not _climbing a freaking tree to come help you." The girl frowned up into the branches above her, catching glimpses of pale limbs and a bright blue bikini through the emerald leaves. The pair had spent most of the summer lounging around the pool in Brittany's neighborhood and had been walking back to the girl's house for lunch when the blonde had spotted the tree. "Oh-my-gosh-San-lets-climb-it!" Brittany had breathed out, grabbing Santana's hand and dragging her towards the monstrous oak. Before Santana knew what was going on, she was there, staring up at the tree that they had walked past hundreds, maybe thousands of times without a word from Brit. _Typical, she's always pulling me into crazy things like this._ A little smile escaped momentarily onto Santana's lips before she remembered she was supposed to be pissed about this little stunt and bit her lip to hide the smile, although no one was looking.

Just then a breeze picked up and the chill in it reminded Santana that a new school year would soon start. She scowled at the thought of another year back at that same stupid middle school, with the same stupid rules and the same stupid kids. _At least Brittany is in some of my classes this year_. _That might make dealing with another year bearable. Maybe I'll even be able to stand that oaf, Finn Hudson. _

She sneered at the thought of Finn as she remembered the last day of 7th grade. She had made him cry. That goon Noah Puckerman had dared him to kiss Brittany and he had tried to put the moves on her by her locker after lunch. By chance, Santana had rounded the corner into the locker bay just as Finn was leaning in for the kiss. Brit, looking confused and scared, was trying in vain to push away tub-of-lard Hudson. Santana hadn't even known Brittany well at the time, but she had beat Finn Hudson's ass real good that day. After he had scampered away, crying, Brittany had tackled Santana in a giant hug. "Thank you, thank you, _thank _you!" this blonde girl burst out, still embracing a thoroughly uncomfortable Santana. Their friendship had just grown from there. 

She thought back to their first sleepover that summer, lying in the girl's double bed next to the blonde she barely knew. She recalled staring uncomfortably up at the ceiling of a room containing entirely too much pink for her taste. "You still awake?" Brit had whispered after they had been lying in silence for a while. Santana had debated pretending to be asleep but her conscience told her not to lie to this doe-eyed, innocent girl. She nodded her head, indicating she was still awake, and rolled to her side to look at the lanky blonde. She remembered how caught up she was in the girl's blue eyes, and the way that the stripes of moonlight coming through the blinds played across Brit's pale skin. _She's really pretty._ Santana had jumped a little bit at the thought, looking away and unconsciously biting her lower lip out of nervous habit. "Thanks again," Brittany had said quietly, interrupting Santana's whirling thoughts.

"Thanks for having me," Santana said automatically, the years her Abuela had spent drilling manners into the strong-willed girl showing through. She had thought that the blonde was thanking her for coming to sleep over.

Brittany had smiled and whispered, "Not for coming over… for saving me, silly."

"Saving you? Oh, from Finn? No problem… I had been looking for an excuse to make him cry anyways. He's a dumbass and he deserved it. Besides it was on a dare and that's just mean. You don't deserve to be kissed by somebody who was dared to do it I mean… err… nobody deserves that… that's not cool… and you seem cool… so yeah…" Santana rambled, staring at the ceiling again to avoid looking into those big blue eyes. Brittany had giggled quietly at the girl's evident nervousness and Santana had frowned at the ceiling.

_Nobody laughed at Santana Lopez, not even this goofy, bubbly, adorable…_ Santana's heart had pounded again at these thoughts and her stomach had suddenly twisted into a tight knot as she tried to figure out what she was feeling. _So what, she's good looking. Why is it a big deal for you to notice that a girl is good looking? There's nothing wrong with that... right? _ At some point during Santana's internal monologue, Brit had stopped laughing. Santana suddenly recognized that the girl's eyes were on her and felt the heat rise in her cheeks. She had been thankful that the dark hid her blush. She had a tough girl reputation to uphold, after all.

They had been lying in silence for what felt like forever, when the blonde finally broke it once again. "Can I tell you a secret?" Brittany asked in a tiny voice. Santana simply nodded, still gazing intently up at the ceiling. When Brit didn't continue, Santana gathered up her courage and once more turned to look into the girl's eyes, giving her a reassuring smile. The expression felt unfamiliar on Santana's lips at the time, and she remembered hoping that it didn't look as goofy as it felt. Brittany apparently didn't notice and, finally, she went on. "I've-never-kissed-anybody!" she spat out. Santana shrugged, confused as to why the girl seemed so freaked.

"Me neither," Santana said nonchalantly, "No big deal. All of the boys our age are just dumb anyways."

Brit was quiet for a minute. "Yeah…" she agreed softly, thinking hard. "But, I mean, that's why it was such a big deal that you stopped Finn. 'Cause that would've been my first kiss and I would've been sad. 'Cause I don't wanna kiss Finn… and that's your first kiss, you know, and it's supposed to be special, and magical, and you should remember it forever, and… and…" the girl stopped, out of breath.

Santana let out an uncharacteristic giggle at the girl's little rant. Brit attempted scowl, but the expression looked about as foreign to her features as the encouraging smile had been to Santana's. "What are _you_ laughing at?" the blonde asked, incredulous, "it's a _big deal!_" The dark-haired girl was taken aback by the sudden seriousness in Brittany's voice.

"Sorry," she said, now trying hard not to laugh. "It's just… well… I'm not… I'm not much of a romantic or anything," she finally stuttered out.

"What's that mean?" Brit said with her head cocked a little to one side. Santana had to bite her lip to stop from smiling when she had noted the similarity between Brit's current expression and one she had once seen on her neighbor's confused cocker spaniel.

"Well, you know I'm…" she trailed off. She wasn't entirely sure what she wanted to say, but she knew that it was something she had never shared with anyone. She looked earnestly at the curious expression in those deep blue eyes. The knot in Santana's stomach traveled up to her throat and rendered her speechless. She mouthed sort of helplessly for a minute, finally closing her lips tightly and shrugging. "I dunno, it's just one of those things people say," Santana finally managed, trying to cover her awkwardness.

"Okay," Brittany yawned, seemingly accepting of the answer. "Will you _pinky promise_ not to tell anybody my secret though?" she asked, her eyes getting sleepy. _Pinky promise? Really? What are we, five? _But Santana had nodded and offered her pinky to the girl. Brit hooked her little finger to Santana's and held on. She looked straight into Santana's eyes, a sleepy half smile on her face. Santana smiled back, a little surprised by how natural it felt for the girl's pinky to be linked with her own. It was just the tiniest connection between them, but it had felt much bigger to Santana and she marveled at the way it made her heart thump faster and louder. When Santana had looked again, the steady rise and fall of the sheets told Santa that Brit had fallen asleep, their pinkies still entwined.

"Uh… Santana…" Brittany's voice brought Santana back to reality. She shook her head, trying to clear the confusing jumble of emotions the memory brought her, and stared up into the tree. A moment passed as she tried in vain to catch a glimpse of her friend through the tangle of branches above her head. "Can you come up here… please?" Brittany said her voice wavering a little bit.

Santana recognized the nervousness in Brit's voice and the dark-haired girl's competitive nature kicked in. "_I told you_ that you'd get stuck," she chided as she jumped to grab hold of a low hanging branch. Despite her objections before, Santana reveled in any opportunity to 'save' Brit. She convinced herself that it was just because she didn't want to see the girl get hurt, but the reward of Brit's lengthy hugs of gratitude didn't hurt either. Santana wasn't as nimble as Brittany, and her expedition up the tree was significantly more awkward and peppered with expletives. Finally though, she stood on a branch directly under where the blonde perched comfortably leaning against the strong trunk of the oak. Brit flashed a mischievous smile down on Santana and the girl's short temper flared a little.

"You made me come all the way up here and you aren't even stuck! What the hell, Brit!" she shouted up at her. The other girl's smile faded and she looked away for a moment. Santana felt a twang of regret at her words, but the girl _had_ made her climb all the way up a fucking tree for nothing. Brit looked back, innocence in her expression.

"Isn't it pretty up here, though?" she asked quietly. Santana looked away from the blonde for the first time. They were in a cocoon of emerald foliage, the sun showing through the leaves and giving everything a green tint. Most of all, Santana felt how hidden they were from the world. _Nobody would know we're up here, not the other kids at school, not our parents, not even God, maybe. _ _Nobody to judge up here… nobody to impress… just Brit. _Again, a smile crept across the girl's tanned cheeks but, this time, she made no attempts to hide it. Seeing Santana's expression, the blonde beamed down on her. In one fluid motion, Brit swung so she was hanging upside-down from the branch, her face only inches from Santana's. The shorter girl just stared, eyes wide and heart pounding faster than she'd ever felt it. Brit stared back at her, smiling widely, her cheeks coloring as the blood rushed to her head. Santana's eyes darted for a split second to the blonde's lips, and she subconsciously ran her tongue over her own. _Now or never_. The dark-haired girl leaned forward those few inches just as the blonde went to swing back up onto the branch. Santana's mouth slammed into Brit's forehead and she stumbled back a little bit, her converse-clad feet slipping from the branch.

Suddenly, Santana was on the ground. Her wrist hurt. A lot. She pulled it into her chest, protectively and bit her lip to keep from crying out. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes and she couldn't help but think that this was punishment. _Girls aren't supposed to like girls! This is what you get for being so messed up._ She felt the tears falling now and knew they were more from shame than the pain in her wrist. Suddenly Brit was there; panicked and saying something that Santana couldn't quite understand. Only then did Santana realize how cloudy her thoughts were and she tried to concentrate on the girl in front of her. She kneeled down next to Santana and was pressing her towel to Santana's side. She winced and tried to back away, seeing the red stain spread across the white towel in Brit's pale hands_. Was that blood_? Santana's head hurt and she felt dizzy. Suddenly there were other people there- one of the lifeguards from the pool and that mom in the green stripped cover-up and a man in a business suit and tie. Santana wanted them to go away. She closed her eyes tight.

For the first day of school of her eighth grade year, Santana had a red cast on her right wrist, twenty-three stitches along her left side, and a desire to bury her feelings that were so clearly wrong.


	2. Night Walks

The cast was gone, the bruises and scrapes all healed, and the stitches had been taken out. But the scar remained. And there Santana was, standing half dressed in front of the bathroom mirror in Noah Puckerman's basement. She stared at the pale, jagged stripe that stood out against her tanned skin and suddenly felt sick to her stomach. She gripped the white porcelain of the sink as she took deep breaths.

There was a knock at the door and Santana jumped. "WHAT?" she snapped, pulling her revealing top back over her head quickly and combing her fingers through her long, black hair. When there was no response, she whipped open the door to find Puckerman, chest puffed out and smiling from ear to ear. She rolled her eyes at him and walked past him haughtily. "What do you want, Puck?" she asked, hoping he didn't notice the tiredness in her voice.

"You, pretty lady," he said as he groped her butt through her tight jeans. She swatted his hand away.

"Don't mess with me right now, Puckerman. I have to go home or I'll miss my curfew," he didn't have to know that the last part was a lie.

"Fine, I'll walk you home!" he followed her like a puppy dog as she grabbed her jacket and walked towards the basement stairs.

"No, Puck," she said, avoiding his gaze. She knew he would try and kiss her again at the door or hold her hand or grope at her some more. She knew he thought that this was more than it was. "Look," she said, glancing up at him for a moment, "I told you before, this isn't anything. We kiss and… stuff. But we… we aren't dating. It's just for fun. It doesn't mean anything."

"I…I know that," he said quietly and a moment later added loudly, "it's not like I like you or anything anyways. I was just trying to be nice."

"Yeah, right… bye," Santana grumbled as she turned and practically ran up the basement steps and out the front door. It was a Friday night in the middle of December and the air was cold against her cheeks. She shoved her hands into her pockets as she walked, her mind whirling.

The blue moonlight on the sidewalk made her thoughts wander back to the first night she slept at Brit's house, when they had talked about first kisses. Her stomach twisted as she remembered how convinced Brit had been that first kisses were some huge milestone. Santana had her first kiss that October when she kissed Puck during a game of spin the bottle at his Halloween party. Or he had kissed her. She didn't really remember. She didn't really think it mattered. What Santana did remember, was that when she finally pushed Puck away, she glanced over at Brit. For a split second, she thought she saw pain in the blonde's eyes but then Santana blinked and that familiar smile was back in place.

Things had been weird between them since the accident at the end of summer and Santana had tried desperately to avoid being alone with Brittany. She still hung out with her when other people were around, but she tried to distance herself. There were no more long days lying in bikinis out in the sun. No more late nights snuggled up on the couch watching movies in Santana's basement. No more sleepovers or hooked pinkies or sharing secrets. Brittany had tried for the first couple weeks. She kept inviting Santana to hang out or sleep over. Santana had always mumbled some stupid excuse. It was hard, because she knew that Brittany could tell that something had changed. Santana saw the blonde's face fall every time she claimed she "had a dentist appointment" or "had to help her mom with something". Brittany might not have done very well in school, but Santana knew she wasn't stupid.

But Santana convinced herself that it was the best thing for both of them. She couldn't be close to Brittany. With Brittany she couldn't pretend that it had never happened. With Brittany she couldn't deny that the feelings were still there. And Santana knew that the feelings were dangerous, and wrong, and altogether too confusing. She had lots of practice hiding her feelings. Boxing them up into neat little packages and shoving them into the back of her mind. Both of her parents were that way. Although they were still married, Santana felt it was more accurate to say they were married to their jobs. Santana admired them both—they were smart, hard-working, and ambitious individuals and both had high-paying jobs. But they had sacrificed a lot to get there, and their relationship was one of those things. Santana could not remember a time that they had been happy together. But she knew they wouldn't get divorced. It was just as though they operated in separate worlds. They hadn't slept in the same bed in years. They were both having affairs. On the rare occasion that they were both home in time for dinner, the meal was eaten in stony silence, simply because neither of them had anything to say to the other. They both loved her, but in trying to distance themselves from each other, they were rarely there for her.

But Santana didn't complain. Not in second grade when they missed her starring role in her class play because they had both gotten stuck at work. Not in fifth grade when they missed her scoring the winning goal in the championship soccer game because they had both been on their cell phones. Not even this past summer when it had been Brittany's mom, and not her own, who held her hand in the back of the ambulance as she was rushed off to the hospital. All of those bad feelings were put away. It would have been easy to get upset. To scream at them and throw fits. But she was always too afraid to rock the boat. She knew that everything in the house was in a delicate balance and, although she was sure her family was as screwed up as they came, she was afraid of what would happen if they reached the tipping point. She was afraid of change.

Most of the time those feelings stayed hidden in the back of her mind where she did her best not to think about them. But it kept her on edge. She knew that was why she was so testy. People could say or do just one tiny thing and suddenly those feelings would break out of those boxes. And she couldn't be held accountable for what she did when those feelings broke out. She felt like a completely different person then. A crazy, bitchy, emotional train wreck. It was this other person, not Santana Lopez, who was now standing in Brittany's driveway. There were tears rolling down her freezing pink cheeks and she couldn't think straight. She walked around to the back of the house to what she remembered was Brittany's bedroom window. The light was off. Santana grabbed for her cell phone to text the girl but remembered that her parents didn't trust her with electronics. After she had dropped her mp3 player in the fountain at the park trying to "teach ducks to sing pretty like other birds", Santana thought that was probably a justifiable decision. Santana laughed quietly at the memory of the girl splashing through the water, desperately trying to catch a duck. And then she was crying again—crying because everything was messed up. She missed Brittany and her crazy ideas and her goofy smile and the way she made Santana laugh like nobody else could. _She's just my best friend and I miss her._ She convinced herself that was all it was—Brit was just a really good friend, the kind Santana had never really had before. And right now she needed her friend.

Santana bent down and groped around with numb hands until she found a small rock. She was still crying and her hands were shaking. She took a deep breath and then threw the stone. She had been aiming for the window but missed and with a _clang_ it bounced off the metal siding. Santana held her breath as she stood there in the cold. But, after a second, a light turned on in the room and the blonde appeared at the window clutching her fat cat. Santana waved weakly as she tried to wipe the tears from her cheeks. Brittany looked puzzled, but put down Lord Tubbington and opened her window. "Hey Santana… I heard a noise and thought Santa might have gotten confused and came early…" Brit trailed off, "…wait, are you crying? Are you okay!" Santana was afraid her voice would crack if she tried to speak so she simply shook her head. "I'm coming down," Brit said, shutting her window and disappearing, only to reappear at the back door a minute later. In a flash of blonde, the girl had her arms around Santana's neck and squeezed her into a tight embrace. Santana's body shook with silent sobs as she realized just how much she had needed this. Brittany held her like that, rubbing her back with one hand and whispering soothingly into her ear. Santana calmed down enough to breathe normally and Brittany pulled away and looked at the girl, concerned. Santana looked at the ground to avoid the girl's eyes and saw the girl's pale feet standing out against the dark grass.

"Christ Brit, you aren't wearing shoes! It's freezing out here, are you nuts?" Santana couldn't help but laugh through her tears.

Brit looked at her seriously "San, you were in trouble. There wasn't time for shoes." She smiled sweetly and moved her hands up to hold Santana's face. She swiped her thumbs over the girl's tanned cheeks, wiping away the tears. Santana's heart was hammering fast from the heat of the hands on her cheeks and the closeness and maybe, maybe just a little bit, from the love she felt for her best friend right now. And then, while she was distracted thinking about how absolutely wonderful Brittany was, the blonde leaned in and kissed her.

It was light and tender and soft and over entirely too fast. But there Brittany was, inches from Santana, beaming widely. "Let's go inside and warm up," the blonde said, locking pinkies with the shorter girl and leading her gently inside.

It was funny; suddenly Santana didn't feel so cold.

**(a/n)** **Thanks for the favorites and the kind comments! This is the first time I have written a fanfic and I would love comments and feedback! Not sure if I will continue this story or not, but I have a few ideas so if anybody would want to see this story continue let me know!**


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